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Remember when you used to ask people what they want to be when they grow up? Why don't people ask this question anymore? Is it because we're considered "already grown up?" If so, I really
missed when that happened.
Today I was listening to NPR's "Fresh Air" with Terry Gross as I do every day of the week. Richard Russo, a writer, was on. He spoke about writing,
criticism, improving at your skill, etc. It made me think about the career choices I have left by the side of the road - passions I once had for certain activities (ones that you had time to try
in school but didn't necessarily have to committ to). Remember those days? When you had time for learning? When it wasn't about money or time or any big picture? When you just did stuff you
were interested in? I used to love writing and even considered becoming a writer. Later on I had to make a decision of what I wanted to focus on and because careers make you choose a certain
path, I chose music instead.
People joke about committment - especially with relationships. Fear of committment in adults is a big issue. But isn't it first learned when you are growing up? Committing to something means you
don't have time for other things. It means you don't have choice. It means if you change your mind down the line then it's harder to get out of. And I don't think I'm talking about relationships
necessarily, but learning...
The adult life doesn't really allow for exploration. There's no time. You need to make money. You need to have a 401K. You need to have direction and a goal. You have to know what you're doing,
when it needs to be done and how you'll get there.
So going back to my first point: what are you going to be when you grow up? I'm going to keep asking myself this question because how can anyone expect the answer to be the same year after year.
For now, I am just satisfied writing this journal entry. It's the closest thing to being a writer without having to go backwards and devote my life to it.
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